I’m not one to say you should do anything, but having just celebrated my 47th birthday on January 20th I do have a message about birthdays:
If it’s your birthday, celebrate it!
Some people have the opinion that we make too much out of birthdays: that a birthday is no big deal, it’s just another day of the year, or it becomes an excuse to feel depressed for being another year older, and that birthdays are triggers for all sorts of comparisons.
Maybe much of this is true.
Yet, I am forever the birthday romantic optimist. I love celebrating birthdays. I love my birthday.
I love celebrating ME!
I didn’t always though.
In fact, I found it very hard to be able to give when it came to giving to myself. I was so much better at giving to others! I’d make a big deal about their birthday, yet hesitate to do the same about my own.
I’ve let my birthday be a reason to feel bad, it’s been a trigger to remind me I was one year older and yet not a step closer to something I had wanted.
In the past, I’ve even tried to convince myself that my birthday wasn’t such a big deal. That usually resulted in an epic fail! This way of thinking usually stemmed from some type of feeling of rejection. Let’s face it, rejection sucks!
Or also down inside there is this belief that it’s somehow selfish or wrong to gloat on yourself too much. That others won’t like you if you do.
So when I hear people say things like, “Birthdays, what’s the big deal?” or “Birthdays, who cares?” I can see the bit of attitude through that facade.
And I see fear.
Because down inside we all it to matter that we are here.
What day is that more evident than the day we were born?
But if you really want to matter, I say it is important that it matters to YOU first.
Which is why I say, “Celebrate your birthday!”
YOUR birthday is the unique day you decided to join this world, and participate in this human experience with others. Celebrate it! Celebrate you. Matter to YOU.
Don’t spend the day working late. Do something that makes you feel good. Eat a nice meal off of a pretty plate. Light some candles. Wear something that makes you feel beautiful. Honor the very fact that you are here, because that very fact is something to celebrate!
Make YOUR happiness important.
It was wonderful for me to receive so many birthday wishes and messages from others. Something as tiny as a FB “Happy Birthday” really touched my heart. But I know that all of this ‘receiving” of love had to start with me giving it to myself.
And believe me, for last few years I’ve been working on it. Self love, that is.
Making my happiness important.
…..because I matter. So do you.